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An a-ha moment…and a question that could change everything in your relationships – and not just romantic ones.  I’m talking about friendships too with this week’s Tune up Tuesday.  Just a little nugget you can use to tune up relationships. 

Your spouse comes home after a tough day at work and starts opening up about their struggles.  Or a friend shares about an issue in their life that they’re dealing with.  If you’re like me, you often jump to solutions.  It’s our nature to want to help those we love, but it often backfires…right?  Why?  Because people don’t want to be told what to do.  Instead they likely want you to process with them and help them figure out the next best step to take. 

Now to that question – when you find yourself in a situation like this, you can’t go wrong with asking – “what do you need from me?”  That removes the guess work.  And it encourages the other person to get clear about what it is they really do want or need.  Maybe a sounding board, maybe your advice, or maybe just a hug.  That’s a question I’ve found to be really helpful time and time again – what do you need from me? 

Consider asking that more, especially in the relationships that matter the most to you.


In addition to hosting mornings on B105.7, Sean Copeland is pursuing a masters degree to be a therapist.

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