The 4 Types of Intimacy That Can Help You Feel Closer than Ever
When we hear the word intimacy, we often think of the physical. Turns out there are 4 kinds of intimacy and physical is just one of them. Let’s go through all 4 and you can take inventory of your relationship and see how you’re doing with them.
- Physical – that has to do with how and when you like to be touched by your partner. Make sure they know that.
- Mental – that has to do with what you can talk about with each other that’s interesting and fulfilling. And if you’re not having interesting or fulfilling conversations, date night is a great place for those. In fact, sometimes when I send a couple I’m working with on a date night… I’ll set up ground rules that you can’t talk about the kids or anything to do with household management – so, no logistics, bills, or kids. Reach deep into your inner world and find something interesting or fulfilling to chat about.
- Emotional – that has to do with feeling safe enough to share openly about what you’re feeling. Knowing that your partner tracks with your emotional experience and offers support at times… that can create safety. And safety is the core ingredient of emotional intimacy. If you don’t feel like you can safely share your inner experience, then figure out why and see if it’s something you can address with your partner or help from a professional.
- Spiritual – that has to do with what gives you meaning in life that you can share with your partner. And it doesn’t have to be religion
If you notice, the emotional intimacy and safety for most of us has to come first. If I don’t feel that emotional intimacy and safety, it’s going to be hard to generate physical, mental, or spiritual intimacy.
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In addition to hosting The Sean Show on B105.7, Sean Copeland is a licensed mental health therapist at Evolve Therapy in Greenwood, Indiana.
