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Recently I had the honor of officiating my niece Brooke’s wedding.  It was also a bit nerve-wracking, considering I’ve never officiated a wedding before and forgot how much talking the person in that role does!  But armed with an online ordination (which is insanely easy to do) and some advice from friends who have officiated weddings, I was off and running and scripting out what I was going to say based on a very basic outline the bride and groom provided.

In one section, I was supposed to provide “advice” to them.  As someone who spends part of my day working as a therapist and often working with couples, I had a number of ideas to share with them.  Things like the importance of communication and conflict resolution.  The need to always show love and respect to one another, was another idea I shared.  But there was area in particular that I shared that not only resonated with them, but with many in attendance that day.  I thought I would share with you what I said:

No doubt at the end of tonight, you will look back and say “this has been the best day of my life.”  I certainly hope you say that! My hope is today this will be the first of many best days of your life.  

I work with couples that often say things like, “If we could just go back to how things were when we were dating or when we first got married.”  

Don’t want that.  Don’t let this be best day of your life and marriage.  The goal should should never be to GO BACK to something.  The goal should always be to pursue something better – the belief that each day provides the opportunity for the rest of your life to be the best of your life.

In reality, this is not just healthy relationship advice – this is helpful in life.  We often think time has past us by or life will never be as good as it was when we were younger.  Maybe you feel like you peaked in high school or college and it’s been all downhill from there?  Don’t try to go back to that, but rather look to improve, to grow and believe that your next day can be your best day.


Photo Credit: Getty Images/Bogdan Kurylo